Monthly Archives: September 2015

Souls and Shit like That

When me and Alexandra Rae died that stupidly snowy night back in ’08 our souls mingled for a bit. My body was a vessel you see, bc I died, so my body was technically vacant of my soul. 

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1078588/quotes?qt=qt2256740

When Favio fucking died his soul was floating around, and his soul decided it loved me and attached itself to a boyish body down here that could love me, openly this time; like he should’ve done the first time.

He attached himself to a manly body that I am not sure was a ‘good fit’, as the owner of Patisserie Lenox said when she rejected me.

No one wants to hire me.

Wrotethisonebeforehemademepromisenottovisit…

I can’t give you the power, or ability, or URGE to want to love me and understand who I am; all I can do is play my song. All I can do is paint my painting, or write my story to make sure that you understand me. This painting, this story, this painting is my heart. It is all that I have left to give to make sure that, even if only for a minute, you understand. Even if only for a nanosecond you believed. Even if you only see the truth for a moment. For a second you truly believed everythinghad the potental to work out. Then we lost it.

“September 11th 2001, a sad, sad day for everyone,” original by Mrs. Glickenhouse.

fuckwarandstuff

We can be bigger people than that. Follow me and I will show you how.

what dyou meanHOW

Breathe. Take a breath. Some people just do not think how you do; accept that. Learn to understand these people who do not think the same, try to explain the way you are thinking. Try to come to grips with the reasoning behind the way they are thinking about the same things.

why should i waste my time 

It only takes one individual, only one, to start a war; but, it takes everyone to end the war. You should start adding to the group of people trying to end this war.

Hypergraphia

-, the medical term for an over empowering desire to write.

Dear Isis

Dear isis,

(lowercaseonpurpose,yousoulsuckingrodents,ifyouthinkgorasecondthat in my personalblogIwillgiveyouthe recognition ofbeinganythingotherthanwhatyouare; a worthless entity that deserves no capitalization,) you’re a major reason I have trouble falling asleep at night. 

Why did she have to die?

I am sure that I would have ended up being like I am without her death, ormine, it just might have taken longer.

Why did YOU (theinfamous’YOU PEOPLE’) need to have someone so pure die, just to give ne the strengthcourageHONESTY to teach you things that a 23 year old girl never should have learned to teach?

Why’d it take something so gruesome happening to make it possible for someone to step up and tell you what you should already know?

Sometimes I just want to erase it all, then I imagine not knowing what death has taught me. That life before it all happened; was that even a life? I was 15. Who can say for sure wether or not I would have grown up to be who I am now if she and I hadn’t died that day back in 2008. If I did just go on living with her; just like how we were living, we honestly might have contemplated killing each other. We probably would have decided against it by now, and we would be making art. BUT maybe not, maybe we would not have been able to live on the same planet. Mars might have been for me…

What would her reaction have been if she saw what was happening in the world?

We both might be off in mars.

Maybe she’s there.